Seyed Hashem Moosavi
Introduction: Honouring Our Elders, Preserving Our Heritage
October 1, the International Day of Older Persons, offers an opportunity to reconsider how society relates to those who carry with them decades of experience, patience, and responsibility. Raising life expectancy and a growing older population, together with changes in family structure and ways of life, have transformed ageing from a purely personal matter into a major concern for culture, ethics, and social policy. Older people are not merely recipients of care; they are the living memory of the family, a bridge between generations, and a treasure of personal and social experience. The way a society treats them may therefore be regarded as a measure of its moral and cultural maturity. Alongside the programmes and achievements of international institutions, the human-centred school of Islam and the teachings of the Ahl al-Bayt (peace be upon them) established, centuries ago, a lofty and dignity-centred position for this stage of human life-one in which respect for older people is joined with preserving their independence, listening to their voices, and benefiting from their experience. Drawing on Qur’anic verses and traditions, this article revisits the role of older people in strengthening the family, identifies several challenges of the contemporary world, and proposes practical ways to safeguard their dignity and effective participation.
The Qur’an and the Traditions of the Ahl al-Bayt (peace be upon them) on Older People
To reach such an understanding, we must first recognise the place of old age within the Islamic worldview. In Islamic culture, this period is not a season of stagnation or uselessness, but a stage of maturity, wisdom, and the manifestation of divine light. The Holy Qur’an and the sayings of the Infallibles (peace be upon them) speak of older people in gentle and respectful terms, without reducing their worth to economic productivity or physical strength:
- A symbol of light and wisdom in the Qur’an: In the Holy Qur’an, God speaks of the old age of prophets such as Zechariah and Abraham (peace be upon them) in language filled with grace and dignity. In the hadith tradition, white hair is described as “a light in one’s record of deeds.” The Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said: «الشَّیْبُ نورٌ فِی الْإِسْلامِ؛ “White hair is a light in Islam.”
- Honouring older people is an act of reverence for God: In a key tradition, the Messenger of God (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said: «إِنَّ مِنْ إِجْلَالِ اللَّهِ عَزَّ وَ جَلَّ إِجْلَالَ ذِی الشَّیْبَةِ الْمُسْلِمِ؛ “Honouring an elderly Muslim is, in truth, an act of honouring and glorifying God, the Mighty and Majestic.”
- Older people are a source of blessing within the community: Imam Ali (peace be upon him), describing their place, said: «رَأْیُ الشَّیْخِ أَحَبُّ إِلَیْنَا مِنْ جَلَدِ الْغُلَامِ؛ “The judgement and experience of an older man are dearer to us than the strength and agility of a young man.” The presence of older people within the family and society is regarded as a means by which divine blessing and mercy descend.
The Role of Older People in Consolidating and Strengthening the Family
This spiritual status gains fuller meaning when it finds expression in everyday life and family relationships. Drawing on their experience and knowledge of family history, older people can help manage emotions, transmit culture, encourage dialogue, and strengthen a sense of belonging. Their contribution is most fruitful when the family regards them not merely as people in need of care, but as members whose views matter and whose right to choose must be respected. The most important forms of this constructive presence include:
- An anchor of calm and stability: In today’s fast-moving world, the presence of grandparents can give family members a sense of security and continuity. Patience and forbearance shaped by years of experience can help ease tension and encourage more measured conversation.
- Passing on identity, culture, and roots: In many families, parents and grandparents preserve shared memories and serve as living narrators of the family’s history, culture, and enduring values. They know what hardships the family has overcome, who stood beside whom in difficult times, and how disagreements may be resolved without turning into lasting resentment. Their presence can create opportunities for children separated by work, migration, or differences of outlook to meet and speak with one another.
By recounting memories and life experiences with care, older people help younger family members understand their personal and social identity and preserve their connection with their family roots. The success of this role, however, depends on affection, fairness, and a willingness to hear every side. In return, children should not place the entire burden of maintaining their relationships on their parents or draw them into the middle of disputes. Perhaps the finest way to honour one’s father and mother is for their children, during their lifetime, to build kinder and more responsible relationships with one another.
A Qur’anic example of this healing role may be found in the story of Prophet Jacob (peace be upon him). After committing a grave wrong, his sons return to their father and ask him to seek forgiveness for them. Jacob replies: «سَوْفَ أَسْتَغْفِرُ لَكُمْ رَبِّي؛ “I shall ask my Lord to forgive you” (Yusuf 12:97–98). These verses show that a father’s position can help open the way to repentance and restore relationships among his children.
- A bridge between generations: Differences in experience, language, and patterns of communication can create distance between generations. Because older people know the heritage of the past and have also lived through the transformations of their own time, they can help parents and children develop a shared language. In turn, contact with younger generations enables older people to remain familiar with new developments and to retain a sense of participation and influence. This relationship is therefore both reciprocal and constructive.
The Crisis of Ageing in Modern Societies: A Warning Bell
Despite these spiritual and familial resources, old age in many contemporary societies faces new challenges. A utilitarian outlook, smaller families, migration, the pace of urban life, and declining intergenerational contact can push older people from the centre of collective life to its margins. This problem is not confined to any one’s society or culture, although its intensity and form vary from country to country. Its most significant manifestations include:
- Measuring human worth by economic production: In some dominant approaches, social standing is tied too closely to employment, income, and productive capacity. Retirement or diminished physical strength may therefore reduce an older person’s social role and leave them feeling overlooked. Overcoming this outlook requires recognition of the value of experience, counsel, knowledge-sharing, and older people’s voluntary participation.
- Weakening family ties and the growth of institutional care: Changes in family structure and an excessive emphasis on individual independence have, in some societies, increased the number of older people living in care homes. Such institutions sometimes provide essential specialist and medical services. Yet when professional care replaces human relationships and the presence of family, an older person’s emotional and social needs remain unmet. The World Health Organization likewise identifies social isolation and loneliness as factors affecting older people’s health, while stressing the need to combat ageism and enable their participation in family and society.
- The exposure of structural weaknesses: Chronic loneliness, hidden depression, age discrimination, and feelings of worthlessness among some older people reveal the limits of a purely material and service-based approach. The experience of contemporary societies shows that technology and prosperity, although essential, cannot by themselves guarantee quality of life without warm family relationships, opportunities for social participation, and genuine respect.
Practical Guidance from the Qur’an and Hadith for Engaging with Older People
Recognizing these challenges is useful only when it leads to clear personal, familial, and social responsibilities. Islam does not limit the honouring of older people to general moral exhortations; it offers practical principles for speaking with them, caring for them, accompanying them, and preserving their dignity. The Qur’an’s most comprehensive instruction on this subject appears in verse 23 of Surah al-Isra: «وَقَضَىٰ رَبُّكَ أَلَّا تَعْبُدُوا إِلَّا إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا ۚ إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَا أَوْ كِلَاهُمَا فَلَا تَقُل لَّهُمَا أُفٍّ وَلَا تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُل لَّهُمَا قَوْلًا كَرِيمًا؛ “Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and that you show kindness to your parents. If one or both of them reach old age in your care, do not even say ‘uff’ to them, nor rebuke them, but address them with gracious words.
From this noble verse and the traditions of the Ahl al-Bayt (peace be upon them), we may derive a set of practical principles for engaging with older people. These begin with courtesy in speech and extend to safeguarding independence, ensuring security, involving them in decisions, and accompanying them in times of need:
- Preserving dignity and courtesy in speech: The verse’s prohibition of even the slightest expression of annoyance reminds us that care is not limited to providing medicine and food. Tone of voice, patience in listening, and protection of a parent’s dignity are also part of care. Even the smallest hurtful expression, such as “uff”, is forbidden; they must be addressed respectfully and graciously.
- Emotional humility: The Qur’an continues: «وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَة “And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy.” This is a beautiful expression of the utmost humility of a child before an elderly parent.
- Honour and participation in society: The Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him and his family) said: «لَیْسَ مِنَّا مَنْ لَمْ یَرْحَمْ صَغِیرَنا وَ یُوَقِّرْ کَبِیرَنا؛ “One who does not show mercy to our young and respect our elders is not one of us.” Honouring older people is a public duty, not one confined to parents. In the Treatise on Rights, Imam al-Sajjad (peace be upon him) also assigns an independent right to the elder: «وَحَقُّ الْكَبِيرِ تَوْقِيرُهُ لِسِنِّهِ؛ “The right of an older person is that he be honoured on account of his age.” He also speaks of forbearance in disagreement and patience with unpleasant conduct. Imam al-Sadiq (peace be upon him) said: «إِنَّ مِنْ إِجْلَالِ اللَّهِ عَزَّ وَجَلَّ إِجْلَالَ الشَّيْخِ الْكَبِيرِ؛ “Honouring an elderly person is a form of honouring God.” This respect is not fulfilled by courtesies and ceremonial precedence alone; older people must be enabled to participate in family gatherings, cultural activities, and decisions that affect their own lives.
- Ensuring peace and well-being within the family: The phrase “in your care” in the verse invites reflection: when parents need support, their children must not withdraw from their lives. The guiding principle is to preserve emotional connection, maintain a responsible presence, and ensure the older person’s safety and peace of mind. This may be achieved through care at home, shared responsibilities among family members, or appropriate specialist services and facilities. In every case, however, delegating care must not result in broken relationships, loneliness, or disregard for human dignity.
- The need for companionship: The Holy Qur’an does not conceal the changes in human strength: «وَمَن نُّعَمِّرْهُ نُنَكِّسْهُ فِي الْخَلْقِ؛ “Whoever We grant a long life; we reverse in creation” (Yasin 36:68). The verse calls us to reflect on our shared destiny. Someone who today needs help to stand, hear, or remember may once have supported others; and those who are strong today may tomorrow need the same companionship.
Conclusion
Old age is not the end of the road, but a season of life in which the fruit of years of effort, experience, and maturity becomes visible. The verses and traditions cited above recognize the older person as a human being endowed with dignity, the right to choose, and the capacity to make a difference; they call upon family and society to show respect, offer companionship, and benefit from that experience. At the same time, challenges such as loneliness, age discrimination, and declining intergenerational contact show that meeting physical needs alone is not enough without attention to emotional, social, and spiritual needs. A responsible return to the teachings of the Holy Qur’an and the Ahl al-Bayt (peace be upon them) can provide the basis for a balanced model-one that takes professional care seriously, respects the independence of older people, and safeguards their family bonds and social participation.
The International Day of Older Persons should therefore not be seen merely as a day for thanking older people for their past. It is an opportunity to reassess how we behave today and to plan for a future of which we ourselves will one day be part. A society that provides older people with healthcare and security, listens to their voices, expands their opportunities to participate, and keeps their family connections alive gives fuller practical expression to the meaning of human dignity.
